I have developed an irrational fear of the dentist to the point that I have postponed appointments in an attempt to delay the inevitable. Ironically I had no fear of giving birth. Giving birth is meant to be one of the most painful experiences that a woman can go through and as it was my first child I had absolutely no idea of what to expect pain wise.
Here are my ramblings and reasonings that I sorted out in my head (possibly talking aloud to myself) while walking home from the dentist today as to why I can happily give birth to child without batting an eyelid and why I break out in a sweat at the thought of a visit to the dentist.
1. If you go to the dentist and are on the NHS you inevitably have to wait for a week or two until you can get an appointment. You are then left waiting all that time with the pain until you can be slotted in somewhere. When you go into labour and have pains and then contractions it should hopefully be over in a matter of hours if not days at the longest. I had no complications in my labour and the SPD and sciatica was bearable after a while as I just didn't really walk that much but when I was in the greatest of pain it was sudden and then suddenly over! No mucking about. Win to labour!
2. Lying on your back with someone peeking into your mouth at a very intimate range in a clinical setting with a light shining over head feels more like an interrogation and possibly torture session. In labour people will give you your space and hopefully allow you to be in pain in peace. Heaven forbid they get too close into your personal space when you are having a contraction and you don't want the assistance as they might loose a tooth and need to see a dentist! Letting you get on with it as opposed to making you feel like a prisoner of war is a definite win to labour!
3. When you need to get dental work done they will numb the pain with injections which takes a matter of minutes and usually has no side effects. You are safe in the knowledge that you can still feel the rest of your body, are not acting like a fool or asking for your Facebook status to be updated just before you are about to jump into a birthing pool like I did. I don't think my husband will ever let me live that down! The TENS machine was slightly painful after a while and it didn't really take away the pain, making me irritated which didn't really help the situation much. All it did was make me finish nearly a tank and a half of gas and air, feel high and forget about the pain for a while however the pain never really went away. No pain as opposed to some pain and acting like a numpty means a win to dentist in my case. Yes, I could have had an epidural but didn't want one so I know I shouldn't really complain, but each to there I own!
4. You somehow always remember dental pain and the pain associated with procedures whereas I can't, for the life of me, remember how painful labour was. I know it was agony at the time and that I didn't like it one bit but I honestly don't remember it at all. Remembering the pain vs. not remembering it at all means a win to labour!
5. After my tooth was fixed I was left with a numb and droopy face making me look slightly odd with people giving me the 'pity' look. I felt compelled to tell people that I didn't know from Adam that I had just had a filling, which in itself is a bit mortifying. In my case it was an old filling that came out but still, I didn't really feel like going into that much detail at the time. After labour I was in a euphoric state. I had a water birth with gas and air and once I was out of the water and the rest of the birthing process was complete, I felt fine. Job done! I was walking fine. I looked fine and had a beautiful baby to show for it. Win to labour!
So, with a score of 4 to 1, giving birth for me is a winner! If I can give birth I think that I can honestly do anything!! Well, that's my logical and it's made me feel slightly chuffed and not so secretly smug. Being a woman is an extremely powerful thing! After all, I am an All-in-One Mum!!!
I know that my experience of labour wasn't that common as some women have a really awful time with quite a bit of intervention and don't possibly get the birth that they planned. I admire each and everyone one of you, especially if you have had more children after that. You see, women are amazing!
Just when you thought my train of thought couldn't get anymore random I drop this bombshell on you!