Over the past year I have learnt that trying to be an All-in-One Mum is actually bloody hard! For those people who think I have it all together, I can tell you that I let the balls drop many a time. Picking them up quickly and in some sort of crazed orderly fashion did help but it wasn't always doable at the time.
When you have a child in reception, a new born, a full time job and a personality where you simply can't still for two seconds without having your hands busy and a mind that never shuts off, it is sometimes hard to get the balance right.
The "hairs of no pigment" on the top of my head had started to increase in number and I decided that enough was enough. I now make less lists and try not to think about the lists of lists of things that need to be put on lists that I have not done. It's a waste of time. I live more in the moment and relax with the things that are not a priority and when I do have the time available I stick to a strict routine so there is order in the chaos. I also gave in and arranged for a cleaner to come in for a few hours a week because I wasn't able to just do it all and keep my sanity.
A few things that I have added to my list of 'bits of random knowledge' gained over the past year are:
- NEVER put off to tomorrow, what you can do today. EVER! NEVER EVER! It won't get done tomorrow. Something else will happen. If you don't do it now you will end up kicking yourself for the whole of the next day (and possibly the rest of that week).
- If your baby is restless and won't sleep and is waking up the rest of the household, co-sleeping is actually okay. If it means that you get an extra few hours before you have to wake up, just do it.
- If you co-sleep, they will sleep in their own cots (when they sleep through). Well, child 2 does and we've reached a happy medium with fewer disturbed sleeps and bags under the eyes.
- Boys wriggle. A lot. A freaking hell of a lot! Slap down those sticky tabs of their nappy so they are out of little hands reach AS SOON AS you undo it. If you don't, the shit could quite literally hit the fan, or the wall as happened in my case.
- Boys will find their rod and tackle and they will enjoy fiddling with them at every available opportunity. They will yank and pull and stretch. They will do it with pride and a huge smile on their face. Telling a 13 month old that it will fall off if he pulls harder, only makes them laugh harder and yank with more enthusiasm. Just let it go...
- If you bottle feed and can afford it, buy a Perfect Prep machine. I have horrific eyesight (-8.5 in both eyes), and I can make a bottle with no mess, in under two minutes at 4:00 a.m. without my glasses on and it comes out at the correct measurement at the perfect temperature. I do this in my half asleep daze, take the bottle to baby, wait for him to finish and then go back to bed. Five minutes, tops.
You can only be the best mum that you can be at that moment in time. I like to think I do a good job (even when child 1 tells me otherwise) but I'm sure she will thank me later. There is no point in thinking that you are doing a better job than anyone or a worse job for that matter, because as sure as dammit, there is someone out there that feels the exact same way as you!
I bid you all adieu as I finish my porridge oats that was meant to be for breakfast, at 12:30 p.m.