When the fog lifts
I've been meeting a therapist via Zoom for the past few weeks who has been helping me talk about my father's death and to put it all into perspective. Her calming approach and genuine desire to help (not all therapists are born equal!), really caught me off guard. I've seen therapists before who didn't probe enough into the real underlying issue and left me no better off than where I was at the start. I have begun to make time to focus purely on myself, trying to understand and put into words what it is that I am actually feeling and look back to when this cloud wasn't hovering over me. I've also started to allow myself to feel and allow emotions to flood back in, which I've been absolutely terrified of doing. So much so that my body freezes at the thought and I would catch myself holding my breath. Isolating this has been a very big worry as it's been such a muddle in my head for so many years that when I finally pinned it down, I heard an audible...